DARVO: The Abuser’s Defense

DARVO is an acronym that stands for “Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender”. It describes a common manipulation strategy used by perpetrators of wrongdoing, particularly those who are narcissists or psychopaths, to deflect blame and maintain control over a situation. Here’s a breakdown of the technique:

1. Deny

The perpetrator denies the wrongdoing or abuse, rejecting any responsibility for their actions. They may claim that the event never happened, that it was misinterpreted, or that the accuser is lying.

2. Attack

The perpetrator attacks the credibility, motives, or character of the accuser. This can involve name-calling, questioning the accuser’s sanity, spreading rumors, or other forms of character assassination.

3. Reverse Victim and Offender

The perpetrator flips the roles, portraying themselves as the true victim and the actual victim as the offender. They may claim that they are being unjustly accused or persecuted, and they often garner sympathy and support from others by doing so.

This technique is particularly harmful because it can confuse the true victim, making them doubt their own experiences and feelings. It also serves to rally others around the perpetrator, isolating the victim and diminishing their support network. DARVO is often used in abusive relationships, workplace bullying, and other scenarios such as politics where power dynamics are at play.

DARVO: Freyd’s Groundbreaking Research

The DARVO technique was first conceptualized and described by Dr. Jennifer J. Freyd, a psychologist and professor at the University of Oregon. Dr. Freyd introduced the term in her research on betrayal trauma and institutional betrayal.

Her work primarily focuses on understanding how individuals and institutions respond to accusations of wrongdoing, particularly in the context of sexual abuse and other forms of interpersonal violence. She identified DARVO as a common response pattern used by perpetrators to deflect blame and manipulate the narrative, thereby protecting themselves and undermining the credibility of their victims.

DARVO’s Devastating Impact

DARVO can have profound and damaging effects on victims.

Here are 10 effects:

1. Self-Doubt

Victims may start to question their own memories and perceptions, doubting the reality of the abuse or wrongdoing they experienced.

2. Emotional Distress

The denial and attacks can cause significant emotional pain, leading to feelings of sadness, anxiety, and helplessness.

3. Isolation

As the perpetrator reverses the roles, victims may find themselves isolated from their support networks, feeling alone and unsupported.

4. Shame and Guilt

Victims might internalize the perpetrator’s accusations, feeling ashamed or guilty for causing trouble or for supposedly misunderstanding the situation.

5. Loss of Trust

Experiencing DARVO can erode a victim’s trust in others, making it difficult to form or maintain relationships.

6. Trauma Reinforcement

The manipulation and emotional abuse inherent in DARVO can exacerbate existing trauma, leading to long-term psychological damage.

7. Damage to Reputation

The perpetrator’s attacks can harm the victim’s reputation, both personally and professionally, as others may believe the perpetrator’s narrative.

8. Fear of Retaliation

Victims may become afraid to speak out or seek help in the future, fearing similar or worse retaliation.

9. Depression and Anxiety

The chronic stress and emotional turmoil caused by DARVO can lead to serious mental health issues like depression and anxiety disorders.

10. Chronic Stress

Ongoing exposure to DARVO tactics can cause chronic stress, which negatively impacts physical health, leading to issues such as headaches, high blood pressure, and other stress-related conditions.

Corporate and Political Darvo

Organizations or institutions might employ DARVO tactics to deflect responsibility or criticism in various ways. While DARVO is often associated with interpersonal abuse, it can also be observed in broader societal contexts, such as political discourse or public relations strategies of corporations facing accusations.

Here’s how these tactics might manifest:

1. Deny

   – Corporate Denial: A company accused of environmental violations might outright deny any wrongdoing, claiming that their practices comply with all regulations, despite evidence to the contrary.

   – Political Denial: A politician facing allegations of corruption may categorically deny all charges, asserting that they are baseless and politically motivated.

2. Attack

   – Smearing Critics: An organization might launch personal attacks on whistleblowers or critics, questioning their motives, credibility, or character. For example, a corporation might label an employee who exposes unethical practices as disgruntled or incompetent.

   – Discrediting Opposition: Politicians or political parties might attack the credibility of their opponents or the media, suggesting that accusations are part of a smear campaign or fake news.

3. Reverse Victim and Offender

   – Claiming Victimhood: Corporations might position themselves as victims of unfair scrutiny or regulation, arguing that they are being targeted unjustly by activists or government agencies. For instance, a company facing backlash for unsafe products might claim they are being unfairly targeted by a “witch hunt.”

   – Political Role Reversal: Politicians accused of misconduct might claim they are the victims of a conspiracy or a politically motivated witch hunt, thereby shifting focus from their actions to the alleged persecution they face.

Effects of Institutional DARVO

– Undermining Accountability

By employing DARVO tactics, institutions can undermine accountability, making it difficult for victims or critics to hold them responsible.

– Confusing the Public

These tactics can confuse the public, making it challenging to discern the truth and eroding trust in legitimate accusations and evidence.

– Silencing Critics

Attacking and discrediting critics can create a chilling effect, discouraging others from speaking out due to fear of retaliation.

In summary, organizations and institutions can employ DARVO tactics to deflect responsibility and criticism, shifting the focus away from their actions and onto their accusers. This manipulation can occur in various contexts, from corporate public relations to political discourse, complicating efforts to achieve transparency and accountability.

Setting Boundaries Against Manipulators

Defending oneself against DARVO requires awareness, support, and strategic responses. Here are some ways to protect yourself:

1. Recognize the Pattern

Understanding what DARVO is and recognizing when it’s happening can help you stay grounded in your reality and not be swayed by the manipulator’s tactics.

2. Seek Support

Connect with trusted friends, family, or a therapist trained in psychopathology who can provide validation and perspective, helping you maintain clarity and confidence in your experiences.

3. Document Everything 

Keep detailed records of interactions, incidents, and any communications with the perpetrator. This documentation can serve as evidence if needed and can help you stay clear about the truth.

4. Set Boundaries

Firmly establish and maintain boundaries with the perpetrator. Limit interactions as much as possible to minimize their ability to manipulate and control you.

5. Avoid Engaging in Arguments

Responding calmly and assertively to attacks can prevent escalating the situation. Avoid engaging in arguments or defending yourself against false accusations, as this can give the manipulator more power.

By using these strategies, you can protect yourself from the harmful effects of DARVO and maintain your mental and emotional well-being.

Breaking the Cycle: DARVO Education

Educating the public about DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender) is crucial for several reasons:

1. Empower Victims

Knowledge of DARVO can help victims recognize manipulation tactics, empowering them to seek help and protect themselves from further abuse.

2. Raise Awareness

Public education on DARVO raises awareness of the subtle and insidious nature of psychological manipulation, making it easier for people to identify and call out abusive behaviors.

3. Support Survivors 

Understanding DARVO fosters a more supportive environment for survivors, as friends, family, and professionals can better validate their experiences and provide appropriate assistance.

4. Prevent Misunderstanding

Educating the public can prevent the misinterpretation of the victim’s behavior and experiences, reducing the likelihood of victim-blaming and ensuring the focus remains on the perpetrator’s actions.

5. Encourage Reporting

When the public is informed about DARVO, it can create a more encouraging atmosphere for victims to report abuse, knowing they are likely to be believed and supported.

6. Promote Accountability

Public knowledge of DARVO can lead to greater accountability for perpetrators, as society becomes less tolerant of manipulative and abusive behaviors.

7. Improve Intervention

Professionals such as therapists, social workers, and law enforcement officers, when educated about DARVO, can more effectively intervene and provide appropriate support to victims.

8. Strengthen Relationships

Awareness of DARVO can help individuals recognize and address manipulative behaviors in their own relationships, fostering healthier and more respectful interactions.

9. Inform Policy and Legislation

Public understanding of DARVO can influence policymakers and legislators to create stronger protections and resources for victims of abuse and manipulation.

10. Accurate Portrayals

Educating the public can encourage more accurate and responsible portrayals of abuse and manipulation in the media, helping to break down harmful stereotypes and misconceptions.

In summary, public education on DARVO is essential for empowering victims, fostering supportive communities, promoting accountability, and creating a more informed and compassionate society.

About the Author

Ilse Gevaert is a psychologist and coach with expertise in trauma, narcissistic and psychopathic abuse, resilience, neurodiversity (ASD and ADHD), and giftedness. Ilse continued her education at prestigious institutions such as Harvard and Cornell, where she obtained leadership certificates that have informed her practice.

Read More on this Topic

The Dark Triad: Narcissism, Psychopathy, Machiavellianism

Breaking Free from Narcissistic and Psychopathic Abuse

Understanding Brain Differences in Narcissism and Psychopathy

Institutional Betrayal Trauma: The Effects of Re-Traumatization

Breaking Free: Overcoming Shame After Abuse

References

Freyd J. J. (1997). II. Violations of power, adaptive blindness and betrayal trauma theory. Feminism & Psychology, 7(1), 22–32. https://doi.org/10.1177/0959353597071004 Google Scholar

Freyd J. J. (2012). A plea to university researchers. Journal of Trauma & Dissociation, 13(5), 497–508. https://doi.org/10.1080/15299732.2012.708613

Harsey, S. J., & Freyd, J. J. (2023). The Influence of Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender and Insincere Apologies on Perceptions of Sexual Assault. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 38(17-18), 9985-10008. https://doi.org/10.1177/08862605231169751

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