When someone who has hurt others gains power, it can shake us to our core. Our bodies remember past hurts – whether personal or collective – and sound all the alarm bells. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, scared, or powerless right now, know this: your feelings are valid, your body is trying to protect you, and you deserve time to heal.
Understanding Trauma Responses to Power
First, let’s acknowledge something important: feeling unsafe when those who’ve misused power gain more power isn’t an overreaction – it’s your body’s wisdom speaking. This is especially true if you’ve experienced abuse of power before, whether personally or through your community’s history.
Yet, like diamonds formed under immense pressure, times of challenge can forge extraordinary strength and leadership within us. True leaders don’t emerge because times are easy – they step forward precisely when circumstances are most difficult, when their communities need them most. Your struggle today may be preparing you for the role you’re meant to play tomorrow.
Signs Your Body is Responding to Trauma
* Trouble sleeping or sleeping too much
* Difficulty focusing or making decisions
* Feeling constantly on edge
* Unexpected emotions flooding in
* Physical symptoms like headaches or stomach problems
* Feeling disconnected from your body
* Changes in eating patterns
* Loss of interest in things you usually enjoy
Starting with Healing
Before we talk about action, let’s focus on healing. You wouldn’t run on a broken leg – your heart and mind need similar care when they’re hurting.
Immediate Self-Soothing
When you’re feeling overwhelmed:
* Place a hand on your heart and one on your belly
* Take slow, gentle breaths
* Feel your feet on the ground
* Look around and name five things you can see
* Hold something comforting – a pet, a soft blanket, a warm drink
* Remember: you are here, now, and you are not alone
Creating Safety in Your Space:
* Make one corner of your home a calm, cozy spot
* Gather comfort items – blankets, photos, meaningful objects
* Control what media comes into your space
* Set boundaries around discussing triggering topics
* Keep some routines simple and predictable
Gentle Movement for Trauma Release
* Slow walking
* Gentle stretching
* Swaying or rocking
* Shaking out your hands and feet
* Dancing to music you love
* Any movement that feels good to you
Connecting with Support
* Reach out to one trusted person
* Consider trauma-informed therapy
* Look for support groups that understand
* Spend time with pets
* Connect with nature
When You’re Ready: Small Steps Toward Healing with Action
Only move toward action when you feel some stability returning.
There’s no timeline for healing, and no perfect way to make change. Start where you are, with what you have, at a pace that feels sustainable. The goal isn’t to push through trauma to take action – it’s to heal enough to engage in ways that don’t retraumatize you or others.
Be gentle with yourself. You’re responding normally to abnormal circumstances, and you deserve care and understanding as you find your way forward.
Understanding Your Trauma Response
When faced with perceived threats to safety and justice, our bodies naturally respond with survival mechanisms:
Fight Response
* Manifestation: Anger, aggressive responses, constant arguing, heightened activism
* Healthy channeling:
* Transform reactive anger into strategic action
* Join or create organized resistance movements
* Practice measured advocacy instead of exhausting confrontation
* Set boundaries around engagement to prevent burnout
Flight Response
* Manifestation: Withdrawal, avoiding news, disconnecting from community
* Healthy channeling:
* Create designated “safety zones” for recovery
* Set specific times for news consumption
* Build supportive networks that feel safe
Freeze Response
* Manifestation: Feeling paralyzed, unable to act, overwhelmed
* Healthy channeling:
* Break down actions into small, manageable steps
* Connect with others
* Practice grounding techniques when overwhelmed
Fawn Response
* Manifestation: People-pleasing, minimizing problems, avoiding conflict
* Healthy channeling:
* Practice setting small boundaries first
* Build confidence in expressing dissent and allow the feelings of discomfort to exist
* Connect with others who model healthy assertion
Reclaiming Your Sense of Power
Personal empowerment comes through concrete actions:
Define Your Sphere of Influence
* Identify areas where you can make impact
* Focus on community involvement
* Build skills that increase your capability to effect change
* Strengthen personal and professional networks
Develop Leadership Skills
* Take on leadership roles in community organizations
* Practice public speaking and advocacy skills
* Learn about effective organizing strategies
* Mentor others in your areas of expertise
Build Resilience
* Establish strong self-care routines
* Create boundaries around engagement with triggering content
* Maintain connections with supportive communities
* Celebrate small victories and progress
Holding Power Accountable
Remember that addressing power imbalances is a marathon, not a sprint:
Build Support Systems
* Connect with like-minded individuals
* Join or create support groups
* Maintain relationships outside of activism
* Seek professional help when needed
Practice Strategic Patience
* Focus on incremental progress
* Plan for long-term engagement
* Celebrate small victories
* Learn from setbacks without giving up
Maintain Perspective
* Study historical movements for change
* Remember that progress isn’t linear
* Focus on systemic rather than personal solutions
* Keep sight of larger goals while working on immediate tasks
Moving Forward
Working for accountability and justice is an ongoing process that requires both personal resilience and collective action. By understanding our responses to power imbalances, developing our capacity for leadership, and engaging in strategic action, we can work effectively toward positive change while maintaining our well-being.
Remember that feeling triggered by abuse of power is a normal response to abnormal situations. The key is transforming those feelings into constructive action while taking care of ourselves and each other in the process.
About the Author
Ilse Gevaert is a psychologist and coach with expertise in trauma, narcissistic and psychopathic abuse, resilience, neurodiversity (Autism and ADHD), and giftedness. Ilse continued her education at prestigious institutions such as Harvard and Cornell, where she obtained leadership certificates that have informed her practice.
Read More on This Topic
10 Warning Signs of Manipulative and Cult-Like Leadership
Understanding the 4 F’s: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn Responses to Threat
Glamorizing Narcissists and Psychopaths: The Media’s Role
Healing from Trauma: Therapeutic Approaches and Strategies
10 Signs You’re Being Brainwashed (And How to Break Free)
More on the Resilient Minds Blog
Finding Your Path: Moving Forward After Trauma
What happens after you’ve weathered the storm of trauma? When the coping tools are working and the overwhelming emotions have settled, a new question emerges:
The Kindness Trap: Why Narcissistic Abuse is Hard to Escape
We’ve long been taught to spot the red flags of narcissistic abuse: the gaslighting, the verbal attacks, the emotional manipulation. But there’s a more insidious
Unlocking the Power of Leadership: Fostering Team Success
When we think of a “leader”, many think of an authoritative figure standing at the front of the room, directing traffic and making demands. This
When the World Sounds Scrambled: Understanding Auditory Processing Disorder
Meet Sarah, a bright 10-year-old who loves art and science. In a quiet room, she’s articulate and engaging. But put her in a busy classroom,
The Power of Chores: Raising Responsible, Independent Kids
As children grow, they naturally seek more freedom and independence. However, with increased freedom comes the need for greater responsibility. One effective way to teach
ADHD Demystified: Unraveling Executive Function Challenges
Have you ever wondered why some of the most creative and innovative people you know seem to struggle with basic time management? Or why that
